I bummed myself out last weekend oh how STUPID I felt when I went through the automatic car wash with my winter decorations (plastic blue snowflakes) still zip-tied to my roof and they all half broke. Bummer… bleh… STUPID… I’ll get past it… snow melts, right?! yes it does…

I often get embarrassed because of my humanness. (and that feels worse than losing the snowflakes). I sometimes get embarrassed because of my lack of remembering. And yet I never want to feel embarrassed to ask questions and learn more – I would rather look uninformed than remain uninformed….

So, no, I didn’t get in trouble from the carwash place. And really importantly they DID break off easily and no damage incurred to the car either, nor to my wallet (cheap things), only to my pride. Pride however is a sin in itself, if we can’t forgive ourselves or if we ignore too freely without remorse, it’s prideful. Like I did this – or I didn’t. Pride can be sin brushed aside.

While vacuuming the car with the free vacuums, which is actually why I went to get a wash anyway, I thought to myself about my own vanity getting myself into this, but you know, it’s normal to wash a car. It was dirty. I like to support this shop. So all in my sorry-ness, Lord, for vanity and pride too, I can justify my actions even my forgetfulness… HUMAN!!! 

Now, I could certainly hide my mistake (or not write about it to process) OR rebuild 2 flakes out of one to seem like nothing happened OR whine forever on something so unimportant (which I know I shouldn’t). So I thought of how trivial this was and me making a big deal out of it was pridefully trivial too. It’s not right for me to whine because infinitely worse things are occurring in the world, like war, disease, hunger, etc. 

But anyway, while cleaning I found the scripture card that means a lot,  “For by GRACE you have been saved through faith. And this is not your own doing; it is the gift of God, not a result of work, so that no one may boast.” EPHESIANS 2:8-9

YES! 

Although I can’t fully wrap my head around “Saved by Grace” – as I haven’t made it up to Heaven yet, I am starting to appreciate that it is forever that has started NOW because Jesus already Saved me. WOW – saved. and wow, I can appreciate “Forgiveness, by Grace” – and “your oops is no big deal, by Grace” – and “cut yourself some slack, by Grace”. (Because yeah grave stuff is also forgiven by a forgiving Father when we repent)… Grace by the blood of Jesus.

I also found a few lost things while cleaning, like money that fell out of my pocket, and I did achieve a cleaner car inside and out. There are some things that are necessary even if trivial. And I decompressed some more by reattaching a couple of snowflakes back up – in pairs this time to mask the lost sticks, and it looks fine, it will make due to use these last bit of their usefulness, which is to make people smile. I achieved a compromise of my guilt and frustration. And I smile too. God however IS the One Whom achieved that “the show must go on” feeling in me.

“I achieved” is not a term we use for Grace, however, that IS a gift. Grace is a gift by God’s grace for God’s grace. And if we can’t achieve it, then no one else can lay down rules for it. God can, yes, and His forgiveness through Jesus satisfied all His Law. So we must hold onto Jesus. God waits and wants our love. We love that He loved us first. Great God.

Jesus – because we are only human after all.

Grace. “For by GRACE you have been saved through faith. And this is not your own doing; it is the gift of God, not a result of work, so that no one may boast.” EPHESIANS 2:8-9

Thank You Lord for Your Grace and for Your gifting…

We do need it (I do) because we are only human after all…

Amen

Amen