Bernadette….What’s the future?, 31MAY – #177



Yeah, I am trying to finish up another one of the four pieces that flooded me last Sunday, was 80% done… I am not sure this one is 100% done now, but it’s about the future, so it will have follow up verses, obviously, someday…. anyway none of us are done in our journeys… Keep moving, keep Vine-ing

When I googled the moody blues line “darker days draw near”  from the song “Forever Autumn”… I came up instead with a poetry book by Hilda Doolittle, a poem where two pages earlier on page 60 it talks about the Pleiades, yeah, the Vine is fine, keeping me aligned…. Sigh…. Here is the “finished” essay…

Bernadette….What’s the future?, 31MAY

It’s so true that everyone is different, everyone is on their own journey, we should not look to those like us for our future, we need to ask God for HIS guidance… He will light the path, so keep looking for the light…. If it’s dark, reach for the Vine and hold on…. You can feel for Jesus’s guidance even when it’s dark.

My confirmation namesake, Bernadette, has a vision in the grotto in Lourdes. She accepts her path, her uncertain future, she says “I don’t need a little corner to hide in”… But accepting her fate at that time was still so dependent on what others expected of her in that day and age (1800s). At least in the movie version (Song of Bernadette) this meant the acceptance of giving up her normal home life, her possibly normal future and potential husband… She enters a convent, where she eventually is diagnosed and suffers and then dies early from a terrible disease…. “the lady said ‘I cannot promise you happiness in this world, only the next’ “… Well, she bore the burden and pain of it all so bravely

So, I am not Bernadette Soubirous (although I do drive a Suburu), but I have truly felt the HOLY SPIRIT blowing me and others, yeah that is most definite. But I am no miracle-worker, I have not seen an actual miracle physical vision of God or Jesus or “the immaculate conception” or caused a healing grotto spring to miraculously appear like Bernadette…. In contrast, I get to see God in everyday life….

And this is why I am less scared to give up my mind and life to the will of God… Because I DON’T believe God wants to take away our normal lives. I don’t have to enter a convent, don’t have to stifle and be quiet about the pain in my life. These “times are a changing”, as Bob Dylan would sing. Giving it up to God means you get a “new normal”…. Sure, if you are like me, you will find God wills you to change to move in directions you didn’t intend… Always for his greater good… Making me more fruitful… But what’s normally good in life – if it already glorifies God – well you’re probably going be able to keep doing it …. “Everything good in moderation” became “Everything God in everything”… That’s a new normal you can probably accept..

I am accepting that and I have been blessed greatly, and please realize that I know I am not alone… Yes what I’ve seen so far in this new Christ-Vined-God-Centered life of mine is amazing!!! …. but guess what? It’s so NOT out if the ordinary… I am not special above others because we are ALL special… We all get to share in this joy if we learn to tap into the true source.

The everyday miracles – they are thoughtful gestures that God sends, everything from smiles to favorite memories that pop into your head out of the blue… On and on I could tell you about mine, but just know that when you prepare yourself to receive these blessings, God will not disappoint!

So, what’s the future, what’s my future?
Even vined, with a future that God holds in His hands, I am still scared… Well, I am confident God will give me the tools, the people, and the resources… for the unknown… possible a future travesty, perhaps not a travesty but heartache for sure… God is not taking away our normal lives, so life will still happen…

‘I cannot promise you happiness in this world, only the next’ “… Well, yes, prayerfully I will bear future burdens and pain with hope, face them bravely and Vinely… That’s why I will take the time now, while the light is shining, to joyfully strengthen my connection to the Vine, shore it up, and then keep it close, so I can find it by feel when “darker days draw near”…

“I don’t need a little corner to hide in”…That’s where Bernadette and I are the same… I should be and will be happy to show my Vine connection while there is LIGHT…and it shows as “plain as day”… new normal…


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