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The Lonely Lost Sheep, 09MAR

Today I felt a little lost in a crowd.  I enjoyed the moment of the St. Patrick’s Day parade – the busiest one I’ve ever been to – but I felt a little lost in the crowd – just did….

DON’T WORRY – downtime is good for my soul…

Downtime makes me think… thinking makes me write… writing makes me connect… connecting makes me understand Jesus more… Jesus makes me think…

Jesus took mental downtime too… He retreated 40 days – He wanted to pray and fast and focus and follow… Jesus needed His Father just as much as we do…

I was at the St Pat’s event to see a friend in the parade, the parade was wonderful… but I thought I should have been doing something at the event,  perhaps  be in the parade, to connect to the people even more,  but no – I was quiet and I was watching on the side – and that also is OK, as I have to learn my quietness…

Of course I was also there for my daily exercise… walking… I thought about mountain hiking that day, this was a great substitute…  instead of being one on a mountain, I was one in a million… a loner… loners exist everywhere… Sure, I could have brought a friend,  surely I could have chatted with people,  indeed I am VERY good at that, finding company in a crowd… but instead I mostly observed the parade quietly – with my voice inside… and my green gear and my smile shining.

I loved the town so wonderfully alive in a HUGE block party. I love watching people for sure, the people were thrilled connecting with other people, the people were living out the new and old connections in their lives… I had no idea who they were, or what they were thinking… that’s when I started wondering about how Jesus felt in a crowd – yeah, what would be running thru Jesus’s mind…

Love…

Longing…

Loneliness…

Hmmmm…..

Love…

Jesus would have known each and every one of them inside and out, even though they had NO idea who He was.

Jesus was incognito for many years prior to His open ministry – and He was surely in many crowds for years. I think that He would have been very pleased that the people were enjoying themselves, but He would have been sad at not connecting. Yes, I could feel him internally weeping: Palm Sunday style. I think that He would have cried internally for all these people who didn’t know they were going to need Him!!! I think He knew that He had so little time to meet everyone in the flesh, let alone teach and convince them to open up their ears.

Jesus of all people would have known that it takes God Himself to open the people’s ears… Jesus of all people would have had to wait until those who had ears could hear… Waiting…

I think that Jesus knew that He would not able to connect instantly. I think that Jesus would have felt lost in the crowd… The waiting must have been tough.

Jesus lost in the crowd…

Jesus gathered disciples to teach and the children ran to Jesus – oh what JOY…

The children at this parade – they were the ones who actually looked at me openly to connect. One girl in particular, about 7 or 8, exclaimed “you and I have the same headband!” – I felt incredibly found for that very moment of time. I felt known and appreciated even if I only had a moment… Connection… her brother, about 3, chimed right in too, showing me his beads. Cool… that was my favorite moment of the whole day… I was noticed…  I was found…

I walked to backtrack the parade route and find my friend, there were so many people on the side that I stepped into the road on occasion. One particular woman called out to me – “you are your own parade”… indeed… another connection was set in my head… I was noticed, I was found… even if I was doing something unusual, I was noticed.

I am my own parade, this is so very true – I am my own lost sheep, this is truly true – I am my own connection,  this is spiritually true – I am being found by Jesus ALL THE TIME. THIS IS THE TRUTH!

He looks and looks for me.

Jesus looks and looks for you too, forever.

Matthew witnessed Jesus instructing the disciples in the company of the little children:  “What do you think? If a man has a hundred sheep, and one of them has gone astray, does he not leave the ninety-nine on the mountains and go in search of the one that went astray?  And if he finds it, truly, I say to you, he rejoices over it more than over the ninety-nine that never went astray.  So it is not the will of my Father who is in heaven that one of these little ones should perish.”

You are your own parade – Jesus is there to watch out for you.

You may feel lost in the crowd or walking the opposite direction – but God rejoices when He finds you.

Be MORE QUIET, to hear Him calling you.

Become childlike, in awe of Him.

Because you ARE the twinkle in His smiling eyes.

Be found.

Amen